“I am Domina Jemma…”
IĀ first discovered BDSM at the tender age of 16 (after experiencing a very premature sexual awakening!) and have worked tirelessly to improve My skill set ever since, expanding on My technical knowledge of BDSM practices with additional courses in psychology, anatomy and first aid. I have also studied rope bondage with some of the great Shibari masters of Japan and various others across Europe, and in addition to My role as a Mistress I am also a renowned fetish model and performer and have participated in some of the largest European fetish events such as Wasteland in Amsterdam and BoundCon in Munich.Ā
My style of domination varies depending on the individual I am playing with and their personal energy. I generally don’t like to make specific plans for my sessions (unless it is necessary for an extended and complex scene which requires a lot of negotiation), and I despise the question ‘What will you do to me Mistress?’Ā
“Are you ready to kneel before me, slave?…”
slaveboysmith: Today at DommeAddiction, I find myself in the presence of the beautiful and world renowned Domina Jemma. Thank you so much for the privilege of this audience, and welcome to DA. I’m very excited to share your story!
Domina Jemma: Thank you for having Me DommeAddiction š It’s a pleasure to be here talking to you slaveboysmith, and am looking forward to seeing what questions you have come up with for Me!
sbs: Well let me start by asking you to share with our readers a little of what drew you to Femdom and how you got your start. Have you always known the control you hold over others, or is there a moment you can point to when you fully realized it?
DJ: I was very young when I first discovered BDSM. I was a sexually aggressive and rampant teen who lost her virginity at 13 (more than willingly!) and got to a point where I manipulated older men into sleeping with me because the skills and experience of boys my own age did not live up to my appetite (being the eldest of 4 with 2 parents that worked full time made me overly mature for my age which made that kind of manipulation easy for me). Despite that, I still got bored very quickly and started to wonder what all the fuss was about. So came my first trip to a sex shop shortly after my 16th birthday, which I found most uninspiring until I found the dark room hidden behind a velvet curtain at the back… Honestly at such a young age I didn’t even understand what purpose most of the stuff in that room even served, but I was sexually experienced enough to get the gist of the dynamics from first glance and something inside me just clicked. There was never any question as to what role I would play in it all, I instinctively knew! I left that shop with a leather corset, floggers, clamps and ropes and went home to scare the shit out of my boyfriend! (Needless to say he didn’t last very long after that hahaha) From there I was hooked, I went back to the store repeatedly and bought everything I could and owned a very impressive collection of S&M toys before I had even bought my first vibrator!! I was lucky that at the time, internet access had just become a more common place thing in the home and that helped me find resources to figure out what the hell I was supposed to do with all this stuff, as well as put me in touch with experienced play partners and submissives who could teach me a thing or two. I did my first professional session through a London escort agency a week after my 18th birthday and I have been doing it ever since!!! I’ve never thought about it, I’ve never questioned it, from the moment I entered that dark room of chains at the back of a sex shop, I knew I had found myself.
There were plenty of signs growing up that I would turn out this way though. I had to be strong willed to help take care of 3 babies while my parents worked, and while I always did very well at school, reports continually came home with remarks like “doesn’t work well as part of a team”, “too bossy”, “throws a strop when she doesn’t get her own way”, “tries to push other students around”, so I think it was always a question of when I would come to understand my dominant nature, not if.
sbs: That is highly impressive, to realize at such a young age and to harness that power. I can just imagine your poor overwhelmed boyfriend and his reaction when you came home with all types of BDSM gear lol! Are there particular fetishes you especially enjoy exploring in your sessions within the limits of what a slave is willing to participate in? Anything that is off limits that those dreaming of a session should be aware of?
DJ: So with regards to your comment about it being impressive me discovering and embracing my nature so young, I’d just like to say on that point that I grew up with a very old fashioned and traditional father figure. He was strict, controlling, domineering and would often try to make me feel ashamed for things like wearing skirts or makeup, associating too much with boys, my body/appearance etc. It could have gone either way. I could have been a quiet, repressed little mouse who wouldn’t say boo to a goose as a result of his conditioning, but for whatever reason it inspired rebellion in me instead, especially around sexual femininity over which he was particularly uptight. He had so much control over my life at home, perhaps that rebellion just happened to be because my sexuality was one of the few things I could explore out of the home and out of his control, but if you ask my mum she firmly believes that he is the reason I have turned out this way!
sbs: Iām sure it played a part. That must have been amusing and satisfying for you to have men your fathers age begging to be your slave and to embrace the amazing Goddess you grew into.
DJ: To be honest I don’t look at it like that. When people hear the details of my upbringing they often take pity on me, say how sorry they are, and then assume that I hate men as a result and that’s why I do what I do, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I don’t hate men, I don’t even hate my dad, I appreciate what he did for me in the end. However difficult, painful and soul crushing it could be to grow up in the environment he created for me – those experiences shaped who I am today and I really rather like who I’ve turned out to be as a result of that! Whether this particular outcome was what he aimed for or not, I AM HAPPY with who I am and I can’t help but be eternally grateful to him for that. He showed me first hand the damage that can be done from being closed minded and in turn made me open minded, open minded enough to be empathetic and compassionate, to learn to understand men and where they come from, and to love them regardless of their faults. I don’t Dominate men from some subconscious need for revenge against my father, I dominate men from a place of pure love and compassion because I get them!
sbs: Well I think I can speak for many out there who are very happy you opted for the pathway you did rather than becoming mousy and repressed. You recently tweeted out about an upcoming forced bi group party that you are hosting. The image attached shows you dominating a slave with your strapon while he is eagerly sucked off by another obedient boy. What is it about forced bi that excites you and that you enjoy so much? Are there other fetishes you particularly enjoy exploring as well?
DJ: There are a few reasons I enjoy forced bi. Guy on guy stuff is hot and I love it when my subs are prepared to do any manner of filth I suggest just to please and entertain me! I also really get a kick out of putting men in the position of the women in their lives, so they can truly understand what a woman puts into giving them pleasure, so they can appreciate it and Her more! But the biggest satisfaction for me is in providing subs with these interests, a safe and discreet space to explore it with like minded guys but still in complete anonymity. Personally, I don’t actually believe that anyone is truly straight or gay. I’ve been studying human sexuality for over 17 years and if there is anything that I have learnt in that time, it’s that sexuality and our sexual interests are fluid, ever changing and evolving, what gives us pleasure today may not do it for us anymore in 10 years time then out of the blue it can start doing it for you again!
I genuinely believe it’s perfectly normal to feel sexual attraction to all genders at different given points in our life and through my forced bi groups I can help these subs come to terms with their desires, accept that they are normal and overcome their shame. I decided to start a group session after not having much luck trying to organize these types of sessions between 2 guys ad hoc. Conflicting schedules, family/work commitments meant most requests went unfulfilled. So I figured if I could organize a group gathering that lands on the same day every month, that would give anybody interested fair warning and time to get organized for that specific date, and it’s a system that’s working so far! I’ve only been running it for a few months, sometimes it’s gone ahead and sometimes it hasn’t. A couple of times I’ve had the issue that the only subs interested in attending were all exclusively bottoms and a room full of greedy subs who only want to suck cock is no good if I don’t have a top available to attend and give them a cock to suck! There are also a lot of guys who back out right at the last minute, whether they have managed to get their deposit in or not! It’s one of those things that actually requires a lot of courage to go through with, it’s the last taboo for supposedly “straight” men, so there are a lot of guys that think they are ready for it, then bottle it when it comes to the crunch! So you’ve got to have a lot of patience for organizing this kind of event and not get bent up about time wasters. Understandably this is a massive step for a lot of men and one that a lot of guys are not ready for even if they think they are. But as news spreads and awareness of the event grows there is more and more interest and every session that goes ahead is even more fun than the last! It’s shaping up to be a little beauty of an event and will just get better and better!
sbs: It would be our pleasure to continue promoting the event as it approaches. I’m sure there is definitely conflict in the minds of slaves, trying to embrace what they desire, or do what they are told because that pleases you. Are there other fetishes beyond forced bi that are staples of your sessions with slaves? Either because they are requested of you, or because you enjoy them so much?
DJ: Iām 35 now so I have been a professional Mistress for a very long time. I have a lot of experience in most practices and there are only a handful of practices that don’t interest me (mainly scat, wrestling and adult babies, not that I judge, they just do nothing for me personally). As a result, every session I do can vary wildly from the others and I wouldn’t say there were any cross session staples, it all depends on the individual I’m playing with. As a Mistress I have the privilege of only engaging in sessions I enjoy, which is most things it turns out, but if I had to pick favourites then bondage – in all its forms but particularly ropes – would be my absolute number one. It gives me the ultimate high to completely remove every freedom for my subs. In bondage they are exposed and vulnerable, yet completely liberated in the relinquishment of their responsibilities, and the trust and connection between sub and Domme that comes from that is invaluable. In close second place I would put all forms of anal and strap on training, sluts are a lot of fun! I also really enjoy being worshiped and anything to do with foot worship, face slapping, ball busting, breath play, whipping and caning, orgasm control and ruined orgasms, electrics, needle play…. who am I kidding, I genuinely love most things!!
sbs: And it’s easy to see that your devoted slaves and worshipers love all that you do, Domina! You paint a very enticing and erotic picture of bondage, helplessness and vulnerability that I’m sure our readers are drooling over. Now as a high profile, elite Dominatrix, I’m sure you’ve had your fair share of high profile men submit to you. That said, is there one celebrity out there, or well known person that you would truly love to have in your dungeon, bound, helpless and exposed for you to enjoy? If yes, who might that be, and why?
sbs: My god…that sounds like an absolute delicious night of debauchery and submission. For those reading the details of your encounters, aching at the thought of serving you either in person or online in some capacity, what advice would you offer them to ensure they make the best possible first impression upon you?
DJ: My expectations are that of most Mistresses, be polite, respectful and considerate of my time, introduce yourself properly and be clear about what you are looking for. I’m not going to engage in idle chit chat nor am I am going to chase you up for more info if you send messages simply stating that you would like a session. Give me information to engage with you or be ignored! But with that being said, I also don’t expect potential subs to jump through hoops of fire just to get a booking. I like to keep things simple, and unless a sub is willing to pay a deposit I will only accept same day sessions, so really all you need to do is call me in the morning of the day you would like a session and we can make the arrangements for the same afternoon! I don’t have any particular requirements of the subs that come to see me. I appreciate that most subs who contact a professional Mistress do so because their personal lives don’t always permit them to pursue full on long term relationships with private Mistresses and I’m proud of the fact that what I do offers everyone the chance to explore their kinks regardless of their personal lives or the level of commitment they are able to make. So it doesn’t matter to me if you are a sub, full on slave or just a fetishist, with lots or zero experience, as long as you are respectful and polite and your interests are in line with mine then there is no reason I wouldn’t see you.
sbs: From what I have seen of you online, and from interacting with you for this feature, I think it’s safe to say that any submissive privileged enough to enjoy a session with you will return for another…and another. There is something completely intoxicating about being in your presence and I thank you for granting me this interview and the chance to share your story. Before I crawl away and get to work on creating an amazing feature promoting you, might this eager slaveboy please ask one final question of you Domina?
DJ: Yes, of course, go ahead.
sbs: Thank you so much. If we were conducting this interview in person, me kneeling before you and trying to remain composed as I asked my questions, how might this interview conclude?
DJ: Hahahahahaha, I think some ass worship to show your gratitude for my time would be the minimum! 
*Domina Jemma prefers you purchase her clips through her website*
