DommeAddiction presents you the Exclusive Interview of the most amazing Domina Ruby Enraylls. She is obviously so elegant and loves to dominate men. Get to know Her a little better in this interview.
DommeAddiction: How long have You been a Dominatrix, and what was it that brought You to this role?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Professionally I have been a dominatrix for about 5-6 years but the first time I was ever paid for real life domination I was 15. I have always been dominant though, even though there were points of time where I thought I supposed to not be and I tried to be “normal” Pro tip: that did not go well. When I was a kid I saw lots of roles where women used sexuality as power and I attracted to that. I have never been the type of people who takes no for an answer and I like getting my way, I supposed being a dominatrix was just a natural fit for me. When I was 15 someone suggested it to me and I just thought “Well of course I’m going to do that!” I tied up other kids and my Barbies when I was young, I can’t think of a time when I wasn’t bossy or kinky so finding a starting point is really difficult.
DommeAddiction: Would You say You are naturally dominant, or is it more of a role play when You are in session?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Dominant is something I naturally am and roleplay is an activity for me. Sometimes I like to pretend to be someone else like a succubus, a nun or someone’s mom but I am never not dominant.
DommeAddiction: What skills do You think a successful Dominatrix such as Yourself needs to have?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Confidence, medical knowledge, intelligence, people skills, ability to ask for help when they need it, keen attention to details, marketing know how and thirst for knowledge. There are a lot of other details but people who lack those aspects are often those who make the most cringe worthy mistakes.
DommeAddiction: Can You explain what makes a man want to be a slave?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Everyone is different, no slave is created equal. Often a slave is looking for a strong woman to give him a purpose beyond himself, it’s very similar to a codependent relationship but if it’s negotiated correctly it can be very healthy for everyone involved. My slave, Zandor, started out as a client. What compels him to be my slave is his desire to please me and make me happy. Being my property gives him purpose and makes him feel complete, loved and like he belongs far more intensely than if I were to just tell him. Funny how that works.
DommeAddiction: What are Your favorite fetishes to explore with Your slaves?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: My favorite fetishes vary from person as each connection is different and for me that plays a huge role in how I play. Some of the corner stones of my play are bondage, strap-on play, sadism (whipping, caning, spanking, clamps, etc), power exchange (tasks, behavior modification, slave training, punishment, etc) and orgasm control (tease & denial, chastity, cuckolding, edging, etc) and mental control (hypnosis, mind fucks, behavior modification, humiliation, fear play, etc.)
DommeAddiction: Is it different for You in person vs in online sessions?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: I suppose, yes. The interaction is different because you can’t touch someone so that element is lacking. You have to amp up the mental aspect to levels much higher than you normally would in person situations. That being said, I have absolutely done in person sessions at online mental levels.
DommeAddiction: Are there any negatives involved in being a Dominatrix?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Everything has it’s negatives, in many ways it’s like living a double life; I have to be very careful who I tell and how I talk about it around certain people. I am involved in the tech industry and there is lots of cross over there so I have run into many of my clients, many people in the community and had my slaves cross paths with all of the above as well. Take into account that I do clips, am an educator, that I’m plastered all over the net. Then, mix in that I care a whole hell of a lot about the privacy of everyone else involved in the equation (I understand that I effectively don’t get privacy as a domina) and what you end up with is the potential for whole lot of awkward.
DommeAddiction: Do You ever do sessions with other Dommes involved?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Yes, I do but honestly I am a bit of loner when it comes to sessions. I used to play with more dommes but I often found it awkward because it often felt like others were threatened by me. While I understand that, it makes for a very uncomfortable scene and it makes it difficult to make friends. To quote Joss Whedon, “Recognizing power in another does not diminish your own.” I tend to play with TS dommes more often than anyone else actually. I suppose when there is a slight difference in categorization it’s easier to not feel threatened.
DommeAddiction: What is the cruelest thing You have ever done to a slave?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Oh my, what a delightful question. Cruelest mentally, emotionally or physically? One of my favorites was carving my initials next to the asshole of one of my slaves on our first session, to mark him as my property. Another favorite was taking my slave’s clothes away, locking them in his car several blocks away and making him run naked to his car with his wallet in his mouth.. One Sunday I crucified a gentleman and watched him suffer. (He was fine afterwards and I have a lot of medical knowledge so there wasn’t a risk, don’t be squeamish!) There are simply too many to pick from! I have been playing for a long time and I am a cruel and creative domina.
DommeAddiction: How do You know when You have truly broken someone and are completely in control of them?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Everyone is different. If I can get them to breath through my torments and relax into it, then I have them under my spell. Often, I have them under my control with the first email. I can tell by a look. I’m not going to devulge those sercets though. 😉
DommeAddiction: Do any of Your slaves serve You outside of sessions? ie. real-life slaves in everyday life?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Of COURSE! What domme doesn’t have real life slaves? I have several who serve me, currently I have a couple who are collared and I have a couple who are courting me. My standards are set pretty high and for good reason; I don’t have a lot of free time and I am very specific about my needs. If you want to play with me in real life you need to have good problem solving skills, be attentive to detail, predict what I’ll want, be intellectual, have a strong drive to grow and learn, be geeky/smart/educated/passionate, be fundamentally kind towards others and have a good sense of humor
DommeAddiction: Have any of Your clients tried to reverse the power dynamic and top from the bottom with You?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Once a client tried to tell me what we going to do in a video session. I warned him twice to stop and on the third warning I told him I was going to cram a dildo down his throt and start punching it. He commanded again so I did what I said I was going to do. He stopped his “requests”.
DommeAddiction: Are the people in Your personal life aware of Your work?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Yes! I am completely out to everyone except my bank! My entire extended family knows and everyone is supportive! I don’t believe in hiding what I do and I don’t believe that what I do is shameful. In fact that most supportive person is my mom who gave me my first whips and the best tips on SPH, you could say she raised me in femdom culture and with a female supremacist mindset. 😉 She bought me my first corsets when I was in middle school as well and in high school once bought me a length of chain so I could chain an older boy (who I was dominating) to our radiator because I didn’t like his girlfriend.
DommeAddiction: Is there anything else you would like to tell Your admiring worshipers, and future slaves, reading this interview?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: I so greatly appreciate your admiration, it is a two way street. The fact that you jerk off to my videos is incredibly hot to me and every time I see another video sale I get this little sense of accomplishment, even if it’s just a single sale. It makes me feel like I own you. When I see repeat purchases it makes me even happier, I like imagining what you’re doing and if you want to write me emails, as long as they are polite and well written I would be delighted to receive them. Everyone likes appreciation. It doesn’t have to be monetary. If you want to make a giant banner across the side of your house, that’s cool too. I’m a total exhibitionist and I love positive attention. So by all means, draw attention to me and give me your positive attention. Don’t worry about “wasting my time” with emails. If you’re booking, email me here: rubyenraylls@gmail.com if you want to send me fan mail send it here: mistress@rubylovesyou.com I will respond when I can. 🙂
DommeAddiction: Any Dommes in particular You’re interested in working with?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: I don’t keep track of other dommes to be honest, I’m not really in the loop! I’m in my own little world. Currently I work with Mistress Jasmine in Vancouver, Lady Grace in LA and Victoria Rage in Seattle.
DommeAddiction: Have You always been dominant in Your interactions with men?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Oh yes! However, I do firmly believe in the idea that a top should experience what she is going to dole out first hand so I have experienced everything that I do regularly first hand and I have a fantastic mentor who I regularly get advice from. It is my opinion that all dominants should have at least one trusted mentor that they can lean on for advice, skill polishing and emergency help. There is no shame in asking for advice, in fact there is a lot of honor in it.
DommeAddiction: What can You tell me about Your journey to becoming one of the most sought after Dommes for admiring slaves to serve?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: My journey started in preschool! I found some magazines that depicted bondage and started tying up Barbies, then I progressed to other kids. When I was in middle school I did online domination and cam shows (some of it paid, risky now!) I got caught by my parents and got in a lot of trouble. I always knew I was dominant! I have had a submissive best friend since I was 5. When I was 15 I had my first paid BDSM session (I didn’t realize it was paid) and my first sexual experience (strap on.) He suggested I become a dominatrix. That sounded like a perfect fit and here we are!
DommeAddiction: At what point did you first realize the power you held over men?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Whew! That is a looooong tale! I think it starts in grade school? There was this rude boy bullying my best friend and I decided that was just not going to happen anymore. I stalked him for like 2 week, plotted his patterns and then pounced! I sat on his face, made him eat worms and made his friends watch. They didn’t dare help him. Funny enough I didn’t get in trouble because he had been such a little shit that the teachers just kind of turned a blind eye. I got a talking to about “personal space” and that was about it. Later on in high school he had a massive crush on me and I tricked him into sending me a bunch of dick pics which I made fun of. He loved it.
DommeAddiction: Is there one type of clip You enjoy making more than all others?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Smothering! I love feeling my slave gasp for air under my beautifully round ass! 😉
DommeAddiction: Cash or gifts? What type of tribute do You prefer from Your slaves to show they appreciate You and are sincere in their desire to serve You?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Oooooh… Tough call. Depends on the gift! Does it come with a thoughtful note professing your undying submission?
DommeAddiction: What role does social media such as Twitter, Skype, etc. play in Your business?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: It’s everything! You have to know about us in order to enjoy our beauty! So fucking follow me.
DommeAddiction: Can You describe how it makes You feel to know You have absolute control?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Being in control makes me feel like the rest of the world doesn’t matter, it’s intoxicating. It makes me feel like I could crush you with a single well spoken word. It’s better than any high, any amount of money, although when I’m in control I can take whatever I want and there’s nothing you can do about it. That isn’t the point, the point is the control. Making you do what I want, things you don’t want to do… For my amusement.. Mmm.. That’s so good. Especially when you show me how much it hurts you to do it for me.
DommeAddiction: Have You ever been recognized in public? How does the slave react to seeing his ultimate fantasy Domme in person?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Oh yeah, it’s a little bit of a rush as long as someone doesn’t make a scene. As we’ve established I’m an attention whore. I like getting notes in my inbox after the fact. 😉
DommeAddiction: Can You tell me how my first session with you in person would look?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: You would walk into a dark all red, old Hollywood style lounge where you would sit at my feet and tell me all about yourself while I calculate your every move. After what feels like just a minute but is more than sufficient for me to know more about you than you actually spoke aloud I will lead you back to my dungeon of delights and lure you into a delightful predicament wilder than your imagination can possibly conjure.
DommeAddiction: Have You been told you make men nervous often?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Constantly, ever since I was a little kid. Good thing I like to watch men squirm!
DommeAddiction: Is there a specific type of slave You find is drawn to you?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Intellectual, nerdy types. Good thing I like smart slaves.
DommeAddiction: Can all submissive men be persuaded to slip across that line into financial domination?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Anyone can be convinced to do anything given the right circumstance and motivation. I am particularly convincing motivation
DommeAddiction: If there was one thing You could change about being a financial dominatrix, what would it be?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: I would change the fact that most findom is done online. I think in person findom is incredibly hot! If you haven’t tried it, you should!
DommeAddiction: If we were conducting this interview in person, how would it end?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: With me bending you over my bench and doing something devious to you, of course! And of course having you worship my shoes!
DommeAddiction: What is the best way for slaves to show You they are sincere in their desire to serve and spoil?
Domina Ruby Enraylls: Write thoughtful messages, read my website and take the time to fill out my contact form instead of just firing out emails. Also, send a deposit when booking an online session.
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